Last year, one of my resolutions was to find another job. I had been searching for 2 years, but not actively. However, push came to shove. It began when the owner became irate, because bows, on Christmas gifts for vendors, were not tied tight enough. She expressed her embarrassment at having to include the gifts but let me know she would not make me rewrap them. A few days later, in front of another employee, she blamed me for the gift count being off the previous year. I was flabbergasted to say the least! I could not figure out why she was exhibiting such an ugly attitude. For five years straight, I had wrapped gifts with never a complaint. Now, all of a sudden, she was finding fault. Thinking this incident was due to holiday stress, I blew it off. However, she began complaining my conversations with clients were too long, my laughter was too distracting, I was too loud. Then some athletes from a major sports team came to visit. She asked me to neaten up the conference room. I put all the loose odds and ends in a drawer. Seconds later, she came to my desk, reprimanding me because the drawer looked like a garbage can!!! At that point, I am thinking WTF?!?!??!? A few days after, she called me into her office. Not to apologize, mind you. She wanted to discuss why things were so tense between us. By then, I had mentally checked out, having no interest in smoothing things over. I pulled out my actor’s card, put on a smile, doing an Academy Award job to make her think things were fine.
The final straw, or I should say, final push was hard. It came when I asked the other owner for compensation for the responsibilities and other duties I had been asked to take on. He looked right at me, shook his head and walked away. That night, I went to Walmart, bought a laptop, revamped my resume and began applying to other companies. As days went by my excitement grew at the possibilities. But, not one company responded.
I knew I needed help to accept the situation as it was. At the time, I heard a song, by Sidewalk Prophets called Help Me Find It. I wrote the chorus on a sticky note…If there’s a road I should walk, let me find it. And if I need to be still, give me peace for the moment. Whatever your will, Whatever your will…can you help me find it? I posted the note, on my desk, in a place where I could see it every day. Whenever I needed encouragement, I read it. As each day flew by, I absorbed the message, concentrating on Whatever your will… And I reminded myself…God has a bigger, better plan for you. Just wait and see.
In June, I found a listing for a receptionist. There was only one thing I did not know how to do. However, I knew it would not take me long to figure it out. So, I sent my resume. Once again, no response. I actually was so busy applying to other companies, I forgot about it. Two weeks later, I received a phone call. Long story short, I interviewed, got an offer, and accepted it without a second thought. Funny thing is when I left my prior company, a lot of people came up to let me know how much they were going to miss me. It was very humbling as I did not realize the impact I had made. Some even asked if I would take them with me. As for the owners? It felt like they went out of their way to avoid me, almost as if I was betraying them by leaving. Ironically, they did not hire a replacement. It is nice to think, also a bit revengeful, I was irreplaceable. Realistically, I believe it was due to finances.
Anyway, been needing to get that out for a LONG, LONG, LONG, LONG…TIME!!! Okay, I got the job, been there almost 6 months. My how time does fly! Yes, God willed me an awesome opportunity. Yes, I am so busy I sleep like a teenager, which is good since that alleviated the insomnia symptom of menopause!! And today, my boss, having found out yesterday I celebrated a birthday over the weekend, bought cake and had the department sing Happy Birthday to me. She also bought two hilarious cards, which everyone signed. And, she makes me laugh OUT LOUD ALL the TIME!!
Moral of Story? Don’t give up…EVER! Believe you can do ANYTHING, no matter who tells you otherwise. Have confidence to learn…yes, I know OLD dogs CAN learn new tricks. Let go and let God take do His magic, you won’t regret it. Don’t accept someone else’s put downs, bullying or belittling attitude. They are the one with the problem, NOT you. Don’t be ashamed for who you are. Be PROUD of you, through and through. When opportunity opens a door, breathe out the fear and RUN through it! You have just been given a gift. Realize, no matter how small, you are making a DIFFERENCE in someone’s life. Remember, the best is yet to come. Lastly, follow the beat of your heart, it KNOWS the right path to journey on…always.
P. S. Just in case you need to hear it… I AM PROUD OF YOU!!!!